I am in the middle of a bad period of insomnia. I never used to suffer from insomnia. The only times in life I've had trouble sleeping have been periods when I've been dumped by a boyfriend. I couldn't stop thinking about it at the end of the day and thus couldn't sleep.
This isn't that.
This has come about from the same snowball of crap that has put me on disability again and in one of the deepest depressions of my life. The two surgeries last year messed things up. Bedrest was the best thing for recovering from surgery but the worst thing when it came to fitness. So I got in worse and worse shape. And that starts other painful things like the pyriformis-caused sciatica, restless leg syndrome and others. Which means I have a harder time sleeping and then I start to go out less because I can't find anyplace safe to exercise at night and nighttime is when I'm awake.
I've been having a bad bout of it for at least 2 weeks now. Last night I went to sleep at about 8am. I woke up at 3:30pm today. I went out to the garden and did stuff for the first time in days. Even though my hands are in bad shape and it means that I might not be able to paint or do anything else I'd like/need to do with my hands. But I've been tiring for the last hour or so and may need to go to sleep again. If I sleep through 'til a normal morning wakeup time, that's fine, but that usually doesn't happen. I may wake up at 3am and there I go again.
There's not even anything normal to my rhythms. Sometimes I'm sleeping 3 hours. Others I'm sleeping 6. Every couple of days the tiredness will catch up to me and I'll sleep 12. And then it's more of the fucked-up merry-go-round.
I've got a find a way out of this.
This isn't that.
This has come about from the same snowball of crap that has put me on disability again and in one of the deepest depressions of my life. The two surgeries last year messed things up. Bedrest was the best thing for recovering from surgery but the worst thing when it came to fitness. So I got in worse and worse shape. And that starts other painful things like the pyriformis-caused sciatica, restless leg syndrome and others. Which means I have a harder time sleeping and then I start to go out less because I can't find anyplace safe to exercise at night and nighttime is when I'm awake.
I've been having a bad bout of it for at least 2 weeks now. Last night I went to sleep at about 8am. I woke up at 3:30pm today. I went out to the garden and did stuff for the first time in days. Even though my hands are in bad shape and it means that I might not be able to paint or do anything else I'd like/need to do with my hands. But I've been tiring for the last hour or so and may need to go to sleep again. If I sleep through 'til a normal morning wakeup time, that's fine, but that usually doesn't happen. I may wake up at 3am and there I go again.
There's not even anything normal to my rhythms. Sometimes I'm sleeping 3 hours. Others I'm sleeping 6. Every couple of days the tiredness will catch up to me and I'll sleep 12. And then it's more of the fucked-up merry-go-round.
I've got a find a way out of this.